New to Birmingham

Now that you've made a break for freedom, whether it be disguised as a three-year slog at university, or just that you fancied a taste of Birmingham, it's time to discover the joys of hardcore bargain Brummie livin'.

Market Madness

Ignore the Freshers Guide, all it'll do is herd you all down to Broad Street and the Bullring. Believe us, there's more to Brum life than being a Broad Street Clone, and you'll save a lot of brain cells (and money) if you avoid navigating round the Bullring on a weekend.

Check out the famous Rag Market, and adjacent Bullring Market, near St Martin's Church, where you can pick up anything from bananas to boots, jewellery to jeans, fabric to fish. The Rag Market was instrumental in the bolstering of this particular Itchy writer's CD, DVD, book and junk collection, and it didn't break the bank once.

Sundays can be spent sauntering round the Flea Market at the Custard Factory, Digbeth, before getting lost in the Sunday Car Boot Sale at Markets Precinct on Pershore Street, where you can kit your new house out ten times over with the hordes of stuff there.

The wonderful £5 shops

A separate species in their own right, these are the shops that litter the streets from Dale End to the Pallasades, in between all the Levis, Adidas and Urban Outfitters stores. Often distinguished by a plastic banner sprawled across the front with 'EVERYTHING £5 OR UNDER' or similar in a Comic Sans typeface. Habitually infested with students and wannabe gangster girls looking for something remotely wearable for the night.

If you're determined not to give into the temptations of the Bullring, head to Primark for some more headache fuelled, cattle market shopping. Be careful not to trip over the bodies of inexperienced city centre Primark shoppers while you manoeuvre yourself to the checkout.

Entertainment

Put that bloody Fresher's Guide down, Goddamn you!

Get down to Digbeth's superclub Air for a night of hardcore raving, set up camp in the Custard Factory for the weekend and get lost in a sea of drum 'n' bass and heavy metal.

Round the corner is Barfly, where all the cool indie kids hang out in their skinny jeans, and all the way down Digbeth High Street you'll find a host of cool pubs to sink some drinks in.

Not a Wetherspoons in sight.

The Glee Club is a cool place to catch some live comedy and the odd burlesque show, and check out The Drum in Aston for some top notch Black arts and music shows.

Escape

Go to Moor Street Station for cheap trains to London, or go get a fix of Shakespeare and cream teas in Stratford upon Avon.

Obviously, being the Midlands, makes it quite difficult to get to the beach in summer, unless you want to follow the herd to Western Super-Mud, but fear not, newbies: we have our very own 'Birmingham Beach', usually at Chamberlain Square and sometimes by St Martin's Church during the summer months, complete with deck chairs, a bar, sand and screaming, pissing children. Aaaahhh...

TL

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